Revision and Reflection

Surname 1
Name of Student
Instructor’s Name
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Will the AI jobs revolution bring about human revolt too?
My previous paper which was entitled “Will the AI jobs revolution bring about human
revolt too?” was a well-researched piece which I think I did well in expressing my arguments in
the clearest and simplest way possible. However, given the broadness and complexity of the
topic, I feel like I would have done so much better in explaining some things and adding some
additional information in order to make the article even better. In this paper, I will, therefore,
discuss and elaborate more on some of the areas I would have improved on regarding my
rhetorical situation, including additional information that I would have added on the article.
To begin with, at the beginning of the article, I directly go to the topic of discussion.
Therefore, the best way to begin the article would have been to start by defining some keywords
such as Artificial Intelligence. This will help the reader of the article get a clear understanding of
what the article is about. It would have been better to give two or more definitions so as to enable
the readers to use the definition that is more understandable to them. After defining what AI is,
then go ahead and start discussing the main topic.
In the third paragraph, where I talk about the output of human in relation to AI, it would
have been better to elaborate more on the manner in which AI is slowly taking over to replace
human labour in different industries. Even though the paragraph talks about how the textile
Surname 2
workers in Britain revolt against technology, more examples related to the spread of AI in
different industries to replace human labour would have been necessary. This will help in
elaborating more on the topic and make it more understandable. In the article, examples are not
used as much as they should to elaborate more on a particular argument. Examples help the
readers of the article to get a clear understanding of the argument. Additionally, they help the
readers to relate to the subject of discussions.
Throughout the paper, no citations and references were used. References are important as
they give proof of the arguments in the article. As Ken Hyland argues, the use of appropriate
textual practices such as the use of citations in an essay or research is important to the acceptance
of claims (Hyland 22). They also help to acknowledge the contribution of other writers. For
example, in the article, I should have put different citations with reference to the writer, Kentaro
Tayoma.
Generally, I think the article was well written, and the topic was well discussed. The
manner in which I put across my points and elaborated on them was exceptional, even though
there is always some room for improvement. The way I discussed different arguments in each
paragraph in support of the main topic of discussion was good, and the article had a good flow of
thoughts from the beginning to the end which gives readers an easy time while reading and
trying to understand the arguments discussed in the article. All in all, given a chance to do the
article again, the issues discussed above would hugely help to make the article better.
Surname 3
Works Cited
Hyland, Ken, and Polly Tse. "Metadiscourse in academic writing: A reappraisal." Applied
linguistics 25.2 (2004): 156-177.
Kentaro Toyama. “Will the AI jobs revolution bring about human revolt, too?”
Associated Press, 2017.

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