The Power Of Vulnerability

Running head: POWER OF VULNERABILITY 1

The Power of Vulnerability

Student’s Names

Institutional Affiliation

POWER OF VULNERABILITY 2

Summary of the Ted Talk

In the talk Power of Vulnerability, Brown, a social worker, and researcher, delves into the

details of vulnerability and how people deal with being vulnerable. As a social worker, Brown

came into contact with people at their most vulnerable, and it puzzled her how people deal with

vulnerability. Brown, like most of us, puts off the emotions that make her vulnerable as she does

not want to deal with that side of herself, but here were people wholly exposed and vulnerable.

As this was a messy topic for her, she decided to research about it and hack it not for self-

appreciation but “to lay the code” for others to see.

Brown decided to start with what brought her to the topic of vulnerability-connection.

Brown was surprised that when she initiated a conversation that would help her understand

connection she was instead diverted to disconnection. For example, when she asked a respondent

about love, the respondent ended up narrating one of their most excruciating heartbreak. The

participants of the research were not ashamed to share their experiences about heartbreaks, about

being excluded and being disconnected. Brown concluded for people to connect; they have to be

seen for who they are; they had to be vulnerable.

The research, with an expected timeframe of one year, spilled over into six years and led

Brown not only to appreciate the concept of vulnerability but also to understand herself; who she

really was. Vulnerability makes one beautiful, it may be excruciating, but it is necessary. We

cannot numb the emotions that we do not want to deal with as this may lead us to numb even

those we want to deal with.

POWER OF VULNERABILITY 3

Connection to the Course

The Ted Talk connects deeply with the course content we have been covering in class.

The talk deals with some interesting topic in Psychology including emotions and feelings such as

shame, fear, love, hate, and belonging. I got to understand how people interact with their

emotions and feelings and the effects of dealing and not dealing with them. I also got to

understand the role of psychologists (therapists) in the real-life world. Hitherto, I have had a

general appreciation of the psychology literature, but after watching the talk, I got a sense of the

hands-on experience I will have when I start practicing.

Emotion

Emotions are central to one’s vulnerable state, i.e., one’s core vulnerability is the

emotional state they do not want to be in contact with or show to other people. Vulnerability

calls for the expression of emotions while invulnerable people suppress their emotions. This type

of vulnerability that is associated with emotion is referred to as emotional vulnerability. The

dominant emotion that is associated with vulnerability is fear. Fear defines the ability of one to

express certain emotional states, i.e. invulnerable people are more fearful of expressing emotions

such as love, the need to connect and belonging.

Also, close related to vulnerability is shame, a feeling linked to the emotion of disgust.

According to Brown, people who were not ashamed of sharing their experiences; who were

ready to get vulnerable could easily connect with others compared to those who were ashamed of

getting vulnerable.

POWER OF VULNERABILITY 4

Cognition

Cognition is the mental process of getting knowledge and appreciating through thought,

experiences, and the five senses. Vulnerability can also arise out of one’s cognitive state.

Cognitive vulnerability is a precursor to psychological problems. It is a cognitive bias, a distorted

train of thought that exposes one to psychological issues. For example, when one undergoes a

traumatic or stressful experience, cognitive vulnerability creates a maladaptive response that

raises the chances of a psychological disorder.

Memory.

Similarly, we shy away from being vulnerable as a result of a memory that we have from

a past experience. Typically, this happens when an experience of vulnerability resulted in

emotional and psychological distress. Therefore, from that horrific memory, one shies away from

being vulnerable and presents a façade of courage.

Personal Connection

Similarly to Brown at the beginning of her study, vulnerability is a foreign concept to me.

I detest being in a vulnerable position. Although psychology literature states otherwise, I, usually

relate vulnerability to weakness. For example, in all the romantic relationships I have been in, I

usually present a filtered version of myself; a version I believe my partner will be approving of.

As a result, I end up not being fully committed to the relationship and eventually a break up. I

shy away from talking about my feelings and exposing the sentimental side of myself. I believe

that this is exposing my weak side and arming my partner with weapons to harm me emotionally.

POWER OF VULNERABILITY 5

However, this assignment has been both paradigm-shifting and eye-opening. I have

appreciated the power and need to be vulnerable. I have come to the conclusion that the idea of

the “diva woman,” who does not expose her emotional side is archaic and should be discarded.

Vulnerability, in a relationship, allows the two to walk through the triumphs and pitfalls of life

and allows both of them to grow and mature psychologically.

Vulnerability, in a relationship, allows us to be ourselves and communicate our

intentions. Being vulnerable allows us to communicate our expectations in the relationship, e.g.,

do we want it to be a casual relationship or a serious relationship. Intentions and expectations are

what sustain relationships. Finkel et al. (2017) term intentions and expectations as the

“relationship-maintenance mechanisms.” Partners who express their expectations and intentions

in the relationship became more committed to realizing those expectations and in the long run,

end up cultivating long relationships with greater bonds.

Communicating my feelings is also another integral component of a relationship that I

have learned from this exercise. As a psychologist or just a plain person, communicating what I

feel will be crucial in my practice and personal life. My clients would like to connect with me on

an emotional level. If they are to open up, be vulnerable and communicate how they feel, I will

have to take the first step. Additionally, in relationships, our partners are bound to make

decisions or engage in certain actions that may not augur well with us. These decisions and

actions may spark a range of emotions within us, and it is only prudent to communicate them

with our partners lest the build-up shatters us from within. Therefore, to engage in these

discourses, we have to be vulnerable and sincere.

POWER OF VULNERABILITY 6

In summary, vulnerability will play a key role in both my personal and professional lives.

It will allow me to form meaningful connections and bonds with my colleagues, partner, and

clients. It will allow me to thrive and flourish emotionally; invoking my emotions where need be

to solve the challenges in my personal and professional.

POWER OF VULNERABILITY 7

References

Finkel, E., Simpson, J., & Eastwick, P. (2017). The Psychology of Close Relationships: Fourteen

Core Principles. Annual Review Of Psychology, 68(1), 383-411.

Place new order. It's free, fast and safe

Paper type

Deadline

Page count

550 words

Total price: $ 15.00

Our customers say

Jeff Curtis

USA, Student

"I'm fully satisfied with the essay I've just received. When I read it, I felt like it was exactly what I wanted to say, but couldn’t find the necessary words. Thank you!"

Ian McGregor

UK, Student

"I don’t know what I would do without your assistance! With your help, I met my deadline just in time and the work was very professional. I will be back in several days with another assignment!"

Shannon Williams

Canada, Student

"It was the perfect experience! I enjoyed working with my writer, he delivered my work on time and followed all the guidelines about the referencing and contents."