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Why does Julien refuse to look away from the crucifix?
According to her own self-admission, Julien hopped to look away from the cross at
some point, but she could not dare. Maintaining a gaze at the crucifix was her indication of
safety and security. Julien feared the demons and a turn a ways from the crucifix would
predispose her to them. She could not hope a better way to get to heaven other than through
the cross. The divinity, soul, and body of Christ did not end with his suffering. A revelation
appears to Julien asking her to look beyond the cross. As is noted in (47), she refused to look
up to heaven. Her reason for the refusal was that she had seen, inscribed in the agony of the
crucified Jesus, ‘a secret inward vision and a perception of the higher part.’ To her, this was
the substance; hence, she could not look away from the crucifix.
Through her contemplative vision, Julien realized that the inward life was the highest
substance in faith and that it incarnated a precious soul that was endlessly rejoicing in the
divinity. Consequently, Julien so she would realize nothing good by looking away from
Jesus. To her, the crucifix symbolized the divinity of Christ who had suffered for the
common good of humanity. Yielding to the temptation of having to look up to heaven to the
Father, would not, according to Julien’s admission, suffice to reach to a union with God.
Julien did not wish to lose either humanity or divinity or both by attempting to bypass the
condition of humanness. Therefore, in as much as it held, she vowed to remain transfixed to
the crucifix.